1. a website containing a writer's or group of writers' own experiences, observations,
'When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change'. I remember hearing Wayne Dyer say that many years ago and it really stuck with me. While I understood the words at the time, I wasn't living it, I only wanted to.
Since arriving back home to Norman Wells, NWT last week, after gypsy'ing around out in the world for a few years (on a journey I chose to take in order to find myself, inner happiness, peace and purpose) I've been feeling elated. My heart is singing louder than it ever has and I'm just SO happy to be home. I wasn't sure what to expect really, as so many parts of the 'old' me have fallen away. I could have come earlier, however I don't do much these days without guidance from Spirit and I always listen, even if I don't want to. Through dreamtime, in the not too recent past, I was finally given the green light!! I always knew this time would come. Time for me to come back to my beautiful little home town in the Arctic :)) How fitting that it turned out to be my birthday month, and the year I happen to turn 50!
There's something profound about those milestone birthdays, an awareness of a shift in the lens through which one views life. Bigger the number gets, the more aware one becomes. At least that's how it's turned out in my experience. What I've been noticing most about being home, is how much I'm not taking for granted anymore. I'm finding pure joy in being surrounded by community and people I love (and I haven't even seen everyone yet!). The simple things like being here while the fireweed and wild roses are in bloom; walking and sitting on the riverbank; complete silence; midnight sun and breathtaking sunsets; massive open sky for as far as you can see; the mighty Mackenzie River and mountains; and last but not least, dear old friends who have always loved and accepted me, especially when I didn't love and accept myself.
There was a time in my life here, when I took most of those things for granted. I wasn't able to appreciate these things like I do today. I suppose there's a few reasons for that. The first being, the absence of these things in my daily life for so long. The second being, I've aged. The other being, I've changed the way I look at things.
There are memories in every place and every face, forcing me to look back over 30 years of my life here. It's so clear to me now, how unhappy I was at many points along the way. I seemed to be able to always find someone or something to complain about at every turn. I can see now that this had nothing to do with how things 'were', and everything to do with how I looked at things. It makes me a little sad that I stayed caught up in that way of life for longer than I'd like to admit. I know there were many years where wild rose season passed me by, I hadn't stepped foot on the riverbank, let alone even notice the 'silence'. I was too busy being a slave to the life I thought I was 'supposed' to live, instead of living a life led by my heart and soul. However, had I not lived that part of my life in semi-conformity, there would be no point of comparison really.
I've noticed over time, my new ability to not take things for granted, has grown stronger. Choosing to follow Spirit's guidance and live without a steady pay cheque for a few years, has me appreciating a bed to sleep in every night and food to eat. I used to take those very simple things for granted every day. As do most people. To go 'without' for awhile has been a huge blessing in disguise for me. It's not only taught me extreme faith, it's amped up my ability to be happy with the simple things. I used to take the ability to buy whatever I needed, totally for granted! Things that I used to think were 'necessities' (like a hair cut) have become something I no longer take for granted.
It's interesting how sometimes people, places or a situation needs to be absent from our lives in order for us to learn to appreciate things more. I'm not sure everyone learns it, but I believe sometimes that's the reason for the absence. I would think someone who has lost everything in a fire or flood, learns not to take 'things' for granted. Sometimes when we lose loved ones, we are reminded not to take the people in our lives for granted too. I'm sure there are a million scenarios we've all lived through, but have we all learned? Or do we conveniently forget, once circumstances change for the better again? I guess that's the key really. Is to not forget that things could be, or have been much worse.
It seems to me, the more one takes for granted, the more one is in the constant state of 'wanting' more or better. When to change the way one looks at things (not taking things for granted) puts us in a constant state of gratitude for the simple things.
Peace, Love and Appreciation for the simple things
It's a strange thing to experience isn't it? Vulnerability. It seems many of us humans would much rather be in constant control, wearing our masks, and choosing the do-it-yourself route, rather than ask for and accept help, or share parts of ourselves we'd rather keep hidden.
To make ourselves vulnerable, is to take a risk, a leap of faith. To embrace uncertainty. To be okay with not knowing what is coming next. To simply be open to whatever comes from us putting ourselves out there in a different way. I think in an attempt to remain in control and 'together', or in wanting to it to appear that way to everyone around us, we rob ourselves of some potentially beautiful experiences. We'd rather feel 'safe' and remain in our familiar place, even if it's not working for us.
Making ourselves vulnerable takes courage. It can feel scary. I'll admit that. I'm no pro at it, that's for sure, but I have noticed that every time I force myself to do something out of my comfort zone (which has happened many times, over the past four years especially) I always learn something new. I also observe myself becoming stronger after every experience.
Vulnerability is not a comfortable feeling for any of us I'm sure, but any kind of inner growth isn't going to feel comfortable. It's always through those uncomfortable times, we know we're growing. I don't imagine a caterpillar is necessarily comfortable through the cocoon stage, as it morphs into a butterfly, but what a worthwhile process for that creature with the end result being freedom and flight!
In February, 2009, I left my very comfortable and familiar life in the Northwest Territories. My soul had been calling to me for awhile already at that point but I'd been to afraid to do what I knew I needed to do. My business was failing miserably and for years already. I'd been living on my savings, and hadn't taken a pay cheque in 2 years at that point. I'm not one to give up easily, or want to see myself as a 'failure', so I stuck it out in that stressful situation for far longer than most people I'm sure.
Looking back now, I can see that I hung on too long because 'quitting' wasn't an option for me, not to mention I was horrified to leave my comfort zone and take a wild leap of faith! That would require me feeling far too vulnerable. I somehow found the courage (or maybe it was exhaustion from the stress? haha) and I did it. I closed the doors on the travel agencies, cleaned out two homes, and two office buildings and was on the plane within six weeks. I had no idea where life would lead me, what I did know was that I was being led. I felt super vulnerable and afraid but I knew I was here to do something more with my life and to find inner peace and happiness. That was my mission.
I had no idea how long it was going to take to 'land' so to speak. I certainly didn't think it was going to be over 4 years or I probably never would have lept. Okay, yes I would have. This journey has found me at times, with very little money. I understand completely now, that I was meant to walk this path. To 'live' it, in order to understand what it feels like to have nothing. I'd only experienced life taking money and everything that comes with it, completely for granted. I look at life through a completely different lens now. Amazingly enough, I've been able to find happiness and inner peace through the most financially challenging times of my life.
Had I not been willing to take a risk, make myself completely vulnerable, and be willing to be led through these uncertain times, searching for true meaning in my life, I'm not sure I'd have found the Artist in me that I'd buried away in order to 'get on with life'. Nor would I have learned to NEVER take anything for granted. Ever. Especially food and a place to sleep. I'd also not have learned to find joy in the smallest & simplest things in life. Mostly, I'd ever have learned the hardest lesson of all for me. How to receive and accept help from others. I'd always been the 'giver'. That was familiar and comfortable to me. To receive or ask for help was far too vulnerable a place for me to go!
I've taken yet another leap of faith lately by way of a fund raising project, to help get me kick started on my path as an Artist. I experienced some feelings of vulnerability again, asking for people to help support my vision. I moved through the vulnerability much faster than I used to and I'm feeling empowered that I took that risk. It's been a heartwarming and humbling experience to say the least. The fund is up to $1208.00 already and I've received beautiful messages from friends telling me how much courage they think I have (when I wasn't seeing it that way at ALL!), how my art has touched them, and how I've inspired some of them. WOW. It's such a powerful outcome and I'm so happy I pushed myself to do it. I'm honored to be able to give the animals a voice through my drawings. They need one. Especially in these times we are in.
If you have no idea what I'm talking about and want to follow along on my journey and read about my vision, the fund raiser page is here:
My humble thank you to everyone who has been following along on my journey, everyone who has purchased a piece of my art, everyone who has given me words of encouragement, a meal, a bed, or a shoulder (and Bobbie for listening to your guidance to leave me a sketch pad, 2 pencils and an eraser before you drove off and left me to house sit for 6 months on Lummi Island in the beautiful state of Washington). I had no idea how much that particular time would alter my life. Finally to Cindy, for believing in me enough to welcome me into your home and family for the past year, having no idea how long it would take for my vision to be clear and for things to move as they are now.
I don't love feeling vulnerable, probably never will. I only know it's worth moving through the uncomfortable part to get to the good part and I'm going to keep doing it! How about you?
Peace, Love and Vulnerability
‘That’s not fog. It’s dragon’s breath. It’s magical. When the dragon’s breath comes, when the fog appears, it is a magical time, a mysterious time. Things begin to change.’
~ The Lessons of Love by Melody Beattie ~
I’ve been working with the moon cycles and Mercury retrograde cycles for quite some time now and have found that life has become a bit easier because I am aware of, and continue to use the energy of these cycles for my personal growth and healing.
Let me say first off that I have a basic understanding of astrology, I am not an astrologer. I’m simply sharing my knowledge and personal experience for those of you who are interested in the unseen energies that move in and around us constantly.
Mercury retrograde energy can feel at times, like a fog has set in over our lives. If we can understand and accept that change is in the air and magic is happening behind the scenes, we can move through the fog with more ease and patience. As there will be a time in the near future when the fog lifts and things are clear and flowing once again.
There are three to four Mercury retrograde cycles per year and they last approximately three weeks. The planet Mercury in general, rules thinking and perception, processing information, education, travel and communication. So when it goes retrograde, it often affects these areas of our lives. For instance, we might notice more than usual, missed messages, misunderstandings, text messages and emails sent to the wrong person, taken out of context, or not being received at all. As well there is often travel mix ups and delays, problems with computers, cell phones, televisions, and vehicles. You might also notice situations, people and issues from the past resurfacing. Especially notice what was happening in your life during the last Mercury retrograde because whatever was going on in your life at that time, will likely resurface in some form so you can face that part of yourself again and continue to clear old unhealthy patterns. Sometimes it is to give you an opportunity to see yourself in a new light and see how you've grown since the last retrograde.
It can be a frustrating time for some people, especially if you are not willing to be honest with yourself and make necessary changes in your life. Or if you are pushing and trying to make something happen when it's not time for it to happen. It could be that your flight gets delayed or cancelled, you buy a new cell phone and it’s a total dud, or your computer crashes. Basically it’s life not going according to your plans. Try to remember something bigger is happening behind the scenes and you are ultimately not in charge even though you’d like to think you are!
This is not a time to make firm decisions, move forward on projects or plans, or sign legal documents or contracts. It can feel at times like we are pushing against a strong wind, so why not wait until the planet moves forward again, and have the wind CARRY us instead? When we insist on pushing forward at this time, we will often find out later that the paperwork couldn’t be completed because of some unforeseen circumstances, the contract or deal falls through, or new information is revealed that might have been important in our decision making process. It is also not the ideal time to purchase a vehicle or electronic equipment of any kind as there are often issues that surface later with respect to that equipment or vehicle, or it could be we just get a lemon.
The best way to use this retrograde phase is to research a new project, or resurrect and complete an old unfinished project, renegotiate a deal, reflect on life and recent situations, revise, review, and relax.
New information is often revealed to us by the end of this cycle, as there is likely something more to learn or release before moving forward on our path. It’s a great practice to back up our computers before Mercury retrograde. Confirm travel itineraries prior to travelling and do be prepared to be patient should your travel end up cancelled or delayed.
Personally I’ve come to love Mercury retrograde despite the fact I’m bound to have some frustrating days. I am simply aware of the energy this cycle brings and use it accordingly.
Mercury Retrograde, friend or foe? You decide.
'As I learn, I teach. As I teach, I learn.' I found these words rolling around in my head one morning as I contemplated life. Words and a concept so simple, yet actually lived out, so very powerful.
It seems once a person has lived enough of their lives, making their way through the obstacles and struggles that are a part of our human experience, this concept becomes apparent, sometimes making some sense of our hardest times.
A mother who loses a child, eventually able to tell her story to others, helps another mother who's just lost a child understand she's not alone and she is stronger than she thinks. An ex-addict who's turned his life around, becomes a beacon of hope for the addict who wants to live a better life but feels he doesn't have the strength or feel that he's worth it. A woman in an abusive relationship finds the strength to take her kids and leave their abuser. Her actions alone, inspiring a quiet young girl who's new boyfriend has abused her for the first time. The homeless man, down on his luck, takes help from a stranger to get on his feet again. The stranger was homeless and penniless at one time in his past, until a stranger helped him. Someone's sister commits suicide, the experience leads that person to live a more spiritual life, now they help other families come to terms with their experience of losing a loved one to suicide.
Trying to make sense of our lives isn't easy sometimes, especially when we are in the foggy, yucky, uncomfortable and painful part of some experience. We usually have to let a lot of time pass before we can make sense of some things, and I think some things, we will never understand. I think what's important, is what we do with our most challenging experiences. How we react to the struggles we encounter is where our power lies.
I believe we are all teachers and students in this class of life, and we continue to learn until the day we die. We may affect hundreds, thousands, or millions of people, or we may only affect a few. Maybe those few that we affect, may go on to affect many? We can't be sure. Sometimes we don't even realize how we've touched someone by sharing a story from our lives that they needed to hear in that moment, or by simply accepting others for who they are and where they are at in their lives without judgement, offering them the gift of belonging.
I've had many bottoms in my life, from all of which I've learned and grown a great deal. They were very uncomfortable at the time and painful beyond belief but looking back on it all now, I can see those situations were all there as opportunities for my personal growth. I chose not to let life's experiences break me, even though at times I felt like they would. I can see now, everything has been there to get me aligned on my spiritual path, finding myself and learning to love myself more every day. This is the place I now find myself inspiring others and I didn't even know I was doing that!!
It always touches me deeply when someone tells me that something I have done or said has inspired them or helped them in some way. Sometimes it's by way of these weekly blogs I write, sometimes through my drawings, and sometimes in conversation they remember something I've said, and sometimes it's just listening to their deepest, darkest, without judgement. Others have helped me to learn in this way as well.
It's funny how after I write a blog or offer someone a new perspective on a situation, the universe will test me to see if I'm walking my talk, giving me the opportunity to learn from what I teach. I notice this as well, when I do a reading for someone that the guidance is for myself as well. Certain situations or circumstances will always arise so I can practice learning from what I'm teaching! It's cool!
It's a great reminder that we're always learning and teaching. It keeps us humble and gives us the strength to keep going when we want to give up.
Peace, Love, and Learn
'You can't force a chicken out of an egg or a leaf out of a bud....things take the time they take'. I've found myself giving this advice in intuitive guidance sessions and in general conversation, over the past few years.
I do take my own advice and put these things into practice most of the time. I'm human though and sometimes I forget and try to rush or force things when it's not 'time'. That's when I find myself in an inner struggle and remind myself of a divine timing.
I've noticed there's a fine line between knowing when to take action and when more time needs to pass, so the climate is more favorable. When I take action and things don't seem to flow, I realize it's not time yet for whatever it is I'm wanting so desperately to happen. When I take action steps and everything flows, then it's time. When things aren't flowing, I know it's either not right for me, or it's not time. That's when I turn my focus and energy somewhere else, more productive. I've learned if I don't focus my energy somewhere else, I get stuck in my analytical mind, obsessing over whatever it is, or being angry and feeling sorry for myself because I'm not getting my way. Oftentimes it takes me inward, to find a place of gratitude for what 'is', and in hindsight I can see that I had more growing, learning, and healing to do, or circumstances weren't aligned yet for my highest good.
Trying to force situations can feel like walking against a strong wind. It's exhausting! We'll eventually get to where we're going but it would be easier to wait until the wind is under our wings, lifting us up so we can fly instead.
We humans can be a pretty impatient bunch sometimes. We want things NOW and OUR way and when it doesn't go that way, we either find ourselves sulking and feeling sorry for ourselves, or having a tantrum (which is all ok to do for a short time, it's part of our process....it's when we stay in those places that we stay stuck).
Accepting life on life's terms and timing, I've found to be a more peaceful path and the more I've found my own inner peace, the more I have been able to accept life on life's terms. When something isn't moving as fast as I want it to or how I want it to, I practice trusting that Spirit can see ten steps ahead of me and things are how they are because I have more learning to do. Or whatever it is I'm wanting to happen (or sometimes can see is meant to happen), will not be for my highest good at this time. I choose to believe that life isn't working against us, it's working in our favor.
I've seen proof of this in my own life, when I look back at times when I wanted something to happen so badly and how disappointed and angry I was at those times. It's very clear to me now, that I was being led to some place even better, and to a stronger version of myself through that process. Sometimes when we are in that mode of wanting to force things to happen and it's clearly not time, we can use it as an opportunity to take a step back, and focus our energy into something we CAN do or change.
We each have our own rythyms, experiences, and ideas, and we all see the world differently. We also have our own relationship with Spirit that is unique to us. It is through the difficult times that I've learned to trust and cultivate this relationship in my life, as opposed to fighting it (as was my way for most of my life). Sometimes I don't understand life, but I don't think we're always meant to 'understand' it as much as we're meant to 'experience' it. Understanding sometimes comes over time, and sometimes not at all.
I try to remember that life is a mystery and there are no certainties. As I remind myself of that more and more often, I've become more patient than I've every been and I've become more trusting that life isn't working against me, it's just working how it works.
Peace, Love and Timing
Last night I was listening to an interview with James Van Praagh as he took part in an online event called Healing with the Masters. James is a well known psychic medium who communicates with souls who have transitioned to the other side. I understand that many people are believers in this, and I also understand that not everyone believes that our souls continue on after this life. I do. Even if you're not a believer, please stay with me here, because I'd like to share a perspective that if we can remember to live by, might change a lot of lives for the better.
First, I'd like to say that I believe no human on this earth knows about such things 'for sure'. We're only going to know 'for sure' how this all works, when it's our turn to leave this world. My personal experiences are what make me a believer in the after life, and that we are souls from spirit having an experience here in human form. The goal of the experience being that of love.
So, last night I'd drifted off through part of the interview and was nudged awake so I could hear a specific part of the conversation, I'm sure to inspire this blog! haha It was about karma.
After working for many years communicating with those on the other side, it's James' belief that when our souls cross over, we experience what is called a life review (this is not a new concept but keep reading), where we are taken on a journey back through our entire lives. He believes as we experience this journey, we are made to FEEL (not see but FEEL) how we made others feel. He says we are made to feel it even more magnified than how it was felt by those we experienced with. Interesting concept right?
James went on to say it is never too late to change our lives and learn to be a better version of ourselves while we're here (which is nothing new to me but maybe someone reading might feel like it's too late - well let this inspire you!). He said it's actually best, to make those changes here in this lifetime versus waiting or not changing at all. He believes it's more powerful as far as affecting our over all karma if we do. He spoke about our crossing over experience being one that felt like heaven versus one that felt like hell, depending on the karma factor we lived out while we were here in this life.
It's interesting how we humans are self absorbed most of the time, making it quick for us to pull up those memories and feelings of when we were hurt by others, yet we don't always think about how OUR words and actions might have hurt someone else. We have all hurt others and we have all been hurt by others. Period. The starting point from here, is the willingness to forgive ourselves and do better from now on.
So, imagine if we all decided to take full responsibility for our lives and our actions from this day forward? Imagine if we stop focusing so much on how others made us feel and waiting for karma to get their asses, and start focusing more on how we make others feel? Imagine keeping in mind this concept of a day that will come where we are made to feel how we've made others feel? Imagine.
We're not perfect though, and likely will not get through our entire lives without being the cause of someone's pain at some point, but if we let this concept remind us to live our lives more aware of how we affect others, the more peace we live while we're here and the less pain we feel when our souls go home. Keep in mind too, that the happiness we've made others feel will also be felt in our life review! Kinda makes a guy wanna spread that around instead?!
So there you have it, food for thought.
Peace, Love and Karma Baby
Last year, a couple of spiritual based 'self help' books made their way into my world despite the fact that I thought I had pretty much read them ALL over the past ten years. The first one was Dark Side of the Light Chasers by Debbie Ford which led to the second book by the same author called Why Good People Do Bad Things. She also made a movie called The Shadow Effect which was equally enlightening. Debbie passed over to the Spirit world earlier this year and lucky for us, left her wisdom behind in the form of her journey and her books.
Since reading Debbie's books, I've been consciously watching myself and my shadows and asking Spirit to show me myself and these darker parts I was possibly still hiding from myself. You know what they say, ask and you shall receive! This journey into shedding the light on those still unseen parts of myself is one that has been instrumental in my growth process. It becomes more evident by the day, that things outside myself that trigger me have nothing to do with them and everything to do with me and my shadow (God I love when it comes out like a song?). :-)
We are all human so we all have this part of ourselves called the shadow or wounded ego. Many people are afraid of their shadow and don't even want to consider that they have one, let alone look at it. It's that part of ourselves that believes bad things about ourselves because of earlier conditioning and usually painful experiences in our lives. It is our inner loser, inner bitch, inner critic, inner judge, inner fraidy cat, inner rage, inner greed, inner jealousy, etc. All of those traits we would rather 'push away' or not admit are there. So we go through life pushing away and not accepting those 'ugly' parts of ourselves, instead of accepting they are a part of us.
Going through life pushing down or hiding our pain, shame, guilt, anger, and self hatred takes A LOT of energy. It causes us to push away those darker qualities of ourselves and bury them so deep we end up wearing masks to cover up what we DON'T want to be. We put on a 'show' to compensate for what we perceive as our shortcomings. In the end it surfaces anyway. The more time we spend trying to hide or cover up that part of ourselves, the bigger the incident when it rears it's head.
It's interesting because we actually need our shadow sides at certain times in our lives. It's to learn to call on those part of ourselves when it's appropriate instead of denying it's even there and walking around like we're all that and a bag of chips. To quote Debbie in her movie "either you're going to use IT (your shadow) or IT'S going to use YOU". I agree whole heartedly. There are times when we need our inner critic, our inner bitch, our inner fraidy cat, etc. We need not deny these parts of ourselves, we really just need to be aware when those parts of ourselves are making themselves known, and ask ourselves if it's an appropriate time for that part to be heard.
Our human basic 'shadow beliefs' are that we are not good enough, we are not loveable, and we are not worthy. It makes me sad just to type that and think of all the years that I've allowed those beliefs about myself lead me through this life which kept me stuck in my old patterns of self hatred. It really does make me sad to know that any human being feels that way about themselves, yet the fact is we all have or do. Now how do we help ourselves move through our shadows?
The key to our freedom is in EMBRACING instead of RESISTING those parts of ourselves that have caused us the most pain and realize there is no dark without light and no light without dark. We need to be grateful for the dark because if we never knew fear, we would never know our courage. If we never knew weakness, we'd never know our strength. If we never knew anger, we'd never know peace, and the list goes on and on. The trick is to not get stuck in the old behavior and stories that run through our heads over and over.
We need to have the courage to look at the parts of ourselves that we hide, not only from others, but even from ourselves! We also need to fully understand that when we are triggered by the actions of another, that it has nothing to do with them and everything to do with us. If anger, guilt, shame, or jealousy comes up through interacting with someone or perceiving a situation, it is there to teach us. To show us a part of ourselves that still needs to be healed. My experience with this process has been that the triggers are huge at first, and the pain sometimes excruciating. However, over time the triggers become less and less until they're gone.
"The cost of ignoring a destructive pattern in ourselves, is self destruction" and "when we embrace our TOTALITY we experience freedom."
A man on the Shadow Effect speaks candidly about how he was sexually abused in a church setting when he was a young boy and how he lived his childhood in fear and his adulthood carrying his secret inside and the shame that was attached to that. He explained that it was only when he was ready and willing to look at his 'shame', talk about it to someone who didn't judge him, he was able to find forgiveness in his heart for the shadow part of his abuser and the part of himself that felt responsible somehow. He found he was able to free himself and move on to use his life to help others who've had similar experiences. Forgiveness is not saying what someone did to us is okay, it's forgiving the shadow part of another human and letting it go in order to free yourself of the burden we carry. It doesn't mean we have to be friends with that person, it's something that's in our hearts. The first step is to simply be 'willing' to forgive...the process takes time but the willingness is the first step.
Our relationship to ourselves is the most important relationship we will ever have so it's worth bustin' out our mirrors! This process isn't an overnight deal...it's pretty much an every day, life long deal but it's definitely worth the ride because in the end we will be shining our true light in the world and feeling lighter and happier than we ever have. At least that's how it's working for me!
We really are good enough, quite lovable and very worthy, regardless of what our shadow tells us.
"As we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others." ~ The Shadow Effect
It's interesting how along the highway of our lives, we humans don't tap into our handy dandy little built-in GPS devices all that often! Here we are gifted with this inner wisdom and guidance to help us on our journey through life, yet we talk ourselves out of what it's telling us or showing us, we argue with it, or we just plain ignore it! I find that quite humorous actually and I've certainly done all of those things more than once. I have learned that when I don't listen to my inner GPS I really do end up lost, taking the long painful way around, ending up at a dead end, and yes even crashing into that big obvious tree up ahead!!
It's ego versus Spirit from where I sit. We come from this amazing, magical, all knowing energy that created us and has the power and ability to have an animal turn color according to season, make a leaf come out of a bud, and turn a caterpillar into a butterfly. This same all knowing energy supplied us humans with an inner GPS and yet we get into OUR 'all knowingness' and logically override it's guidance ?? Denial is a factor too, sometimes we don't want to hear what we know deep down because that will mean change of some sort and we oftentimes prefer to keep things movin' right along avoiding the shake ups at all costs. Interesting bunch we humans are, and I would imagine quite humorous to observe from the Spirit world or an alien ship. They probably watch us all bumbling around trying to figure everything out on our own, spending hours, days and weeks obsessing over something we have zero control over, and making decisions that ultimately end up hurting us, when it's all quite obvious had we SIMPLY listened to our built in radar?
I know we've all experienced those times we didn't listen. You know how afterwards you sit in the chaos and debris and go 'something told me I shouldn't have done that, or trusted that person, or took that turn or whatever...I just KNEW it!' It's better to follow our intuition and make the changes we need to make before the universe kicks our asses and forces the change for us. In my experience the former is far more comfortable!
I think everyone's GPS works a little differently.....it might be a nudge, a whisper, a feeling, a knowing, or a vision but no matter the form in which we receive our inner guidance, we all have it. The more I've gotten to know myself and strengthen my connection with Spirit, the stronger and more specific mine has gotten. I receive it as a 'knowing' or as a 'feeling' in my gut and I actually ask Spirit to crank it up for me.....twist that puppy into knots if I'm on the wrong road pretty please!!! It's worked for me as long as I've listened and kept driving even though I couldn't see what was coming around the next corner.
It's extremely important in these times that we learn to trust our OWN intuition rather than looking to others to give us answers about our lives. It's great to get an outsiders perspective and suggestions but always come back to your higher self and follow THAT. Following our inner GPS means leaving out the questions 'how' and 'why' and learning to TRUST in working WITH it. Taking a turn that your gut is nagging you to take but your head is trying to talk you out of, will get you to your next destination with minimum wear and tear. Never hurts to apply a little patience too ;-)
So you just might wanna power up your inner GPS for the ride! Here's to the journey!
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” ~ Marianne Williamson
Do you ever feel overwhelmed by what is going on in the world? Does your soul nag at you, that you are here to help in some way, but you feel unready, unsure, or worse small and insignificant? Do you wonder how you can use your life and your voice to contribute to the greater whole? Do you feel afraid to speak your truth for fear of not being liked or approved of? Do you know deep down you need to make changes to your life but you feel stuck and afraid? Or maybe you are so self absorbed that you aren't thinking about anything but yourself and how everything affects only you? I've felt all of these things at different times.
I think somewhere inside each of us is a voice that is always whispering to us. Sometimes we listen and sometimes we don't. The voice is more like a scream at times, which for me has shown up as a deep sadness, a longing for something more, as well as a feeling of overwhelming urgency that I am here to do more than go through the motions of a life that society dictates as the 'norm'. I have also felt challenged by my anger at humanity, our systems, and the state of imbalance on this planet. Sometimes this has had me feeling quite small and insignificant. Like what's a girl to do? and who's gonna listen to me?
Since I've been purposely and knowingly walking my personal spiritual path, I've learned that when I feel overwhelmed and small, or triggered by anger at the state of our world, that the most productive thing I can do is have a chat with Creator. It doesn't matter what name you call the energy that is bigger than us, it only matters that we acknowledge it (and if we don't that's our choice, but it's been my personal experience that without that acknowledgement, life is lived more in a state of struggle, than one of peace). I've found that to express my anger, worries, sadness, and concerns and ask to be shown the way, relieves me of feeling small and that I am somehow carrying the weight of the world on my shoulders. After my chat (some would call prayer), I let go and wait for my guidance. It always comes. There's a flow, a process that begins to happen when one makes this a constant practice. I believe our relationship to Spirit is our own personal, unique experience and I can only share my own. I've learned to lean on this unseen energy, rather than choosing to be angry at it, or not believing it even exists (which was my experience for the first 35 years of my life as I called myself an Athiest). To be angry that things don't look how we think they 'should', or are not happening our way or in the time frame we expect, is to stay stuck and frustrated, which is energy we could be using to do what we can to help turn things around so we can all live in a better world.
I've learned that my partnership with that something bigger than me, has given me strength and courage to the point where I don't recognize myself some days, and I certainly never feel alone. I understand that I (and you) are an extension of that energy, here in human form on a mission to turn this world around. What we've come here to do on a personal level, can be found a couple of ways, one is by looking at what we have been through in our past and believing that we are meant to help others by having experienced and healed through those experiences. By healing our past and becoming strong enough to share our story with others, is purpose in itself. Secondly we can look at what we are passionate about. It may be children, animals, our food sources, or the environment. It's usually what makes us extremely sad, or pisses us off and fires us up!! We think 'someone' needs to do something about this!!! That someone is us.
I believe we all have a purpose that is unique to us, and that our collective purpose is to turn this planet around. I believe many humans are already awake to this and are actively living their purpose, and I believe some aren't awake yet are actively living their purpose on a soul level, I believe some are beginning to question their lives and why they are here, and I believe that some will not be waking up in this lifetime, and that's okay. I see us crossing paths with other souls who are in alignment with us, which is creating groups of people who are on the same wave length. And there is always power in numbers.
I've also learned that when I am aware of, and purposely using my life to help the greater whole in my own little way, that doors of opportunity open and the next steps appear quite magically. But when I've put myself and my fears, or personal gain first, nothing flows and I live in struggle. I've learned that things move slower than I 'want', and I've learned patience on my path to purpose.
We can often experience that feeling of insignificance when we put pressure on ourselves to do something 'big' right now, today. Peace comes with taking small steps towards a vision, which leads to more small steps until we are beginning to see progress on our path when we stop to look back. It's a process and it doesn't have to be taken all heavily and seriously (something I've also learned the hard way!).
I've learned that the most powerful thing I've ever done has been to commit to finding my true self and my soul's purpose. That process has me knowing beyond a shadow of a doubt, that I am not working alone because I have experienced the help that is always readily available to me from Spirit. To understand and live this, is to experience the most powerful relationship I've ever had.
Once I moved past the anger and frustration in my life, and I committed to discovering myself, my happiness, and why I am here, the answers have been and continue to be slowly revealed. When I was seeking answers PRIOR to making a commitment to myself and my purpose, I would find myself continuously frustrated and going in circles.
I think we all have a part to play and no part is more or less significant than another. We will not find our part by comparing ourselves to others. We will not find our part by denying our gifts. We will not find our part by avoiding the changes we know we need to make in our lives. We will not find our part by numbing ourselves with addictions. We will not find our part in the longing, wishing, waiting, hoping for someone to come along and do it for us. We will only find our part by making a commitment to knowing ourselves on a soul level, then being courageous enough to share our souls with others, in whatever way that is for us. It may be through speaking, writing, story telling, music, poetry, art, dancing, praying, teaching, etc. The main thing is that we no longer stay stuck in our old painful stories because we are afraid of our own authentic power.
Peace, Love and Purpose
I believe there is hope, even when we face death and loss.
I believe we’ve chosen this path to walk.
I believe we are not our bodies, I believe we are souls having a human experience.
I believe we've chosen to experience being human here and now which means death and loss of any kind is an inevitable part of that experience.
I believe we can experience the seasons in our lives much like we experience a rainbow after it rains or a leaf die where a bud appeared at one time.
I believe when we experience a person, animal or any living thing die, we are being shown that eventually something new will takes it’s place.
I believe that life moves in cycles. A baby is born, a new opportunity appears.
One soul transitions to the next stage, making room for another.
I believe our souls choose to leave the earth plane when they do. I believe they never really 'die' they simply transition out of their human form. I believe they remain beside us after they transition and they always leave lessons for us to learn by. I believe we need to allow ourselves to cry, grieve, and miss them, all the while knowing they are near and we will heal. I believe we can talk to them and they can hear us. I believe they talk to us all the time through dreams, songs, and other signs. I believe death exists to wake us up so we live our lives fully. I believe it gives us the opportunity to stop and ask ourselves why we are here and what is it that we’ve come to do?
We experience death and loss continuously throughout our lives. It comes in many forms. We lose or change jobs. We break up with a partner or spouse. Our children grow up and leave home. We move to a new house, or a new town. Our friends move away or drift from our lives.
Change, transition, death is inevitable. It hurts for awhile that's for sure but it doesn't have to hurt forever. I think the feelings make us feel uncomfortable which gives us the opportunity to soften, become more loving, and grow spiritually if we allow it.
Each time we experience change we experience a death of something old, a loss, an old way of being, much like a snake sheds another layer of skin. We must then allow ourselves a time of adjustment and to grieve what 'was'. When we experience change and loss in the form of a 'tragedy' we can choose one of two roads. We can grieve for the rest of our lives and assume the victim role OR we can take the time we need to grieve (as is a natural part of the death process), eventually accept it as it is, and honor those who've passed by living and using our lives to the fullest. We can be open to receive the love offered to us by others as we move through our difficult time. We can learn to begin to question and find what fills us up. To find what truly brings us joy in our hearts, or we can cry for the rest of our lives.
When we begin to question why we’re here, we find the answer in part, has to do with us having a purpose and our own unique gifts to share with the world. To hide our gifts, our light, hurts us. To let it shine, not only helps us, but it gives permission to others to find and shine their own light. I believe it's part of the Creator’s grand plan.
I believe if we learn to forgive ourselves and others it will free us from carrying around the weight of past burdens....it doesn't mean we forgive the actions of another or that we hang out for coffee, it means we acknowledge that all humans have a shadow side (yes, even you and me!) and make poor choices. Forgiving that part of them frees a place in our own heart for more love to get in. Carrying it around only hurts us.
I believe when I look in the mirror that I'm the only one that sees what I see.
I believe our lives are a gift.
I believe stress and struggle continue for those who remain in the victim role and at a distance from Spirit.
I believe if we learn from our mistakes we don’t have to repeat the pain of the same lesson over and over again.
I believe life puts the same circumstance in front of us until we ‘get it’.
I believe if you want change, you have to change.
I believe listening and following our intuition, and trusting our ‘gut’ feeling means we're working together with the Universe/Creator/God/Source for the highest good.
I believe we need to listen to our hearts and not let the fear in our heads try to talk us out of how we feel.
I believe in being generous with ourselves and others.
I believe we benefit greatly by learning to have compassion for ourselves and others as we walk this earth walk.
We entered into this life with nothing material and we will leave this life with nothing material. When our souls are ready to transition to spirit and leave our human vessels behind, that we can only take what is in our hearts. I believe we need to find who we 'really' are at our core. We are not our job title, our bank balance, and our 'stuff'. I believe none of these things determines who we are. I believe we are deserving and worth a happy life despite our past. I believe in second chances.
Sometimes when it all feels like too much, I get quiet and remind myself that I am a soul in a body, with seven billion other souls in bodies, spinning around on a giant rock in a vast universe. That perspective doesn't have me singing and dancing right away, but it does bring me closer to something greater than me, and that always gives me hope.
I believe we can live the life we dream about, if we choose hope over hopelessness.
Peace, Love and Hope
It's my sincere hope that sharing my perspective and personal experiences on my own journey to myself, helps you on yours. Peace, Love and Sharing